Thursday, January 25, 2007

Will Ferrell's world of facial hair

The utterly preposterous bleach-beard goatee, as worn in Zoolander

Bill Simmons list of the most underrated things about Anchorman includes:
"Burgundy's fake mustache. It's just a little off -- like maybe 1/10th tilted, like they spent an entire day in the makeup room tinkering with it before deciding, "All right, we got it, that's sufficiently ridiculous!""

The audacity! The cockiness! The unrestrained sex-appeal of the Ricky Bobby flavor-saver and sideburns.

A professorial beard, the better for making sweet love to Rachel Dratch, his lovah.

In the exalted history of impersonation facial hair, this beautiful offering comes the closest to revealing to all of humanity exactly what God must have seen on the seventh day of creation, when he looked down and saw that it was good. Will Ferrell you are a DELIGHT!! ... What is your favorite curse word?

I'm standing here, staring at Bruce Dickinson! (The cock of the walk, baby!) And if Bruce Dickinson wants more cowbell, we should probably give him more cowbell! And, Bobby, you are right - I am being selfish. But the last time I checked, we don't have a whole lot of songs that feature the cowbell. (I gotta have more cowbell, baby!) ...and I'll be doing myself a disservice and every member in this band, if I don't perform the hell out of this. (Guess what? I got a fever! And the only prescription.. is more cowbell!) Thanks, Bruce. But I think, maybe if I just leave.. and, maybe I'll come back later, and we can lay down the cowbell.


Eric said...

The cowbell speech might be the single most inspiring piece of fiction known to man. Shakespeare could never have written something of that caliber. Most likely because Shakespeare had that weird pointy mustache, chin strap combo instead of a real beard.

Mike said...

How you know if a mustache is great: it receives a most honorable mention on Man Beard Blog.

adspar said...

There is no doubt that the Ron Burgundy mustache is on the list of the greatest mustaches of all time, if not at the very top. Offhand, other contenders include:

- Tom Selleck
- Sam Elliot
- Hitler
- John Bolton